Tired of having to take time off work to prepare for more than a dozen death anniversaries at her husband's family every year

My husband is not the eldest son, but we live in the countryside, raising our parents, so everyone assumes that the death anniversary is held at my house. Many times I want to ask my eldest brother who is in Hanoi to share the death anniversary with me, but I am hesitant....

My husband passed away more than 10 years ago, my two children are studying far away so I'm home alone.

My husband's brothers all have families in Hanoi, so since my husband was alive, we had to take care of all the death anniversaries.

Since my husband passed away, every year I have to take care of more than ten death anniversaries of my great-grandfather, my husband's parents and his younger siblings who died young and unmarried...

I am a secondary school teacher, so every time there is a death anniversary in my family, I have to ask for leave from teaching, then rush to the market to shop a few days in advance, and invite relatives.

Every time I go to a death anniversary, I have to prepare at least 5-6 trays. In the countryside, if one person invites and another doesn't, they will be criticized.

These days, my brothers in Hanoi often bring their whole families back, and many times I have to prepare nearly ten tables of food.

Every year I have to worry about taking care of more than a dozen death anniversaries, I'm really tired (illustrative photo)

I am working or have to take a lot of time off when it affects my work. Every time I finish a funeral, I am exhausted for several days because I am busy cleaning and tidying up the house. Everyone comes to eat, contributes a little money and then goes home, I take care of all the work by myself.

My husband is not the eldest son, but we live in the countryside to support our parents, so everyone assumes that the death anniversary is at my house.

Many times I want to ask my eldest brother who is in Hanoi to share some of the death anniversaries with me, but I am afraid that people will think I am unfilial to my ancestors. If I have to worry about taking care of more than ten death anniversaries every year, I will be really tired.

Source: https://giadinh.suckhoedoisong.vn/met-moi-vi-phai-nghi-lam-de-chuan-bi-hon-chuc-dam-gio-dang-nha-chong-moi-nam-172241214122225475.htm